Ok, ignoring all the OMGOMGOMGOMGTHEYDIDITANDSHEWASTOUCHINGHISBUTTANDOMGOMG stuff, which is VERY important, I want to know how Pearl and the other Crystal Gems dealt with Steven’s disappearance. Like, I highly doubt they would be underwater for a week, so I’m betting they came home and OH DEAR GOD STEVEN IS MISSING OH FUCK.
And Pearl called the police three hours after they came back from their trip when he was gone like:
"We’re looking for a little boy named Steven, he’s cute, tiny, wearing a red shirt with a star on it, and he has a gem on his belly button about the size of-"
"A gem? You mean a belly button ring? How old is Steven?"
"Don’t you think that’s a little young for piercings?"
"What? No, no, it’s an actual gem! *panicking* It’s a gem, on his navel and HE’S LOST AND WE’RE SO WORRIED ABOUT HIM HE COULD BE SERIOUSLY HURT!"
"Calm down, ma’am-"
"CALM DOWN? ARE YOU KIDDING ME-*muffled noises as Garnet takes the phone*"
"*Garnet* So can you find him? We’re doing everything we can at the temple, and we have to find him."
"We’ll do everything we can."
And so there’s like flyers all over town and Greg freaking out because OH GOD THIS IS LIKE EVERY WORST NIGHTMARE HE’S EVER HAD AFTER MIRROR GEM/OCEAN GEM AND OH GOD STEVEN IS GONE!
And like the entire town is super worried because as crazy as the Gems can be, Steven’s a really sweet kid and everyone wants him to be ok, and of course, Lars’s gang is worried about him and Sadie and EVERYONE can’t get donuts because there isn’t anyone else there and then suddenly like a week into this panicked search, Steven, Lars and Sadie just show up drenched in mud, Sadie’s arm in a bandage and wearing Lars’s shirt, all of them cut up and Lars and Sadie avoiding each others glances and suddenly there’s this massive group hug as all three of the Gems are hugging him and Pearl’s crying and tears are running down her silly bird nose and Garnet even looks a little like she’s gonna cry and Amethyst is trying not to cry either and just noogies him while hugging him too and OH MY GOD WE WERE SO WORRIED WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?
And he’s in SO much trouble for even THINKING of doing this to them does he have any idea how worried they were? And he’s double grounded by both the Gems and Greg and he’s never allowed to use the warp pad again (until he earns it, at least) and Sadie’s in trouble with the Gems after Steven mentions the whole ‘found the warp pad about seven days into the eleven days they were missing’ and Pearl’s more pissed than anyone thought she could be like ‘WHAT WERE YOU THINKING? YOU KNOW STEVEN’S ONLY 12 AND DIDN’T YOU THINK ABOUT HOW WORRIED WE ARE!?’ and everyone’s mad at each other and Steven has to bring them back together.
And the pièce de résistance is that Lars suddenly breaks down sobbing and when everyone worriedly asks him what’s wrong, he chokes out, sobbing in hysterics, that he just realized he threw his phone into the water and NOW HE’S GOING TO HAVE TO BUY A NEW ONE!
Everyone glares at Lars, episode ends..
SOMEONE PLEASE FANFIC THIS. I WANT THIS SO BAD. IF SOMEONE WROTE THIS I WOULD BE SO HAPPY.